Let the Naming Begin! 07/12/2016 02:11 AM CDT
Following the recent news of the upcoming birth of an imperial heir, rumors of injudicious comments and overtly disrespectful suggestions have followed involving potential names for the as yet intra-uteran tyke.

In particular, a pair of Cholen-esque monastics assumed that the newborn would be most easily referenced by his status as Heir precipitating one's suggestion of the name "Brush" and the other "Freshnur". Both were severely reprimanded. A third, too enthralled with his own creativity to learn from the mistakes of others publicly offered his choice, "Kleer", based upon the assumption that the child's status as heir would be appended as a parenthetical qualifier.

Immediately upon the heels of this embarrassing revelation, it came to light that the envoy from the Elven Nations had lost no time in making light of the soon-to-be-mortal offspring's christening. His suggestions included "Heir Toodaigahntoomara", a second choice, "Issyuman", based on the recognition that Elven communication with the child would be almost exclusively via communique, and hence would be pre-pended with the address, "To: Heir...", and a third suggestion, "Monkey-tailless", which was offered, "...because it is overtly derisive, and because it rhymes with his familial name. The fact that it rhymes should make it much easier for him and his subjects to remember."

The envoy's departure from Tamzyrr followed close upon the tendering of his proffered suggestions. He was seen to engage in a manual ritual with his newly arriving replacement, a ritual referred to as a "high five" by those familiar with the customs and vernacular of the immortal race.

- Lewella Parsnips, Gossipmonger-at-Large
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