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DragonRealms · Thiefly In-Character Discussions and Reflections

EDWARDSJP

Joke 02/23/2004 12:10 PM CST

So the guild leaders of the Barb, Pally and Teef guilds all decide to get together and discuss the adversities within each of their guilds.

After the meeting they are each feeling a certain pride towards their own guilds and decide to have a contest to prove which guild has the bravest members.

Agonar, the Barb leader steps up first and walks them both back to his guild where the usual Tog warfare is taking place in the training room.

He goes up to the largest and dumbest one and says "my son you must prove your bravery for me today and take your own life in the most gruesome way you can.

The Tog immediately draws forth a mighty 2 handed beheading-axe and slices off his own legs and while spasming on the floor screams "Honor to all barbs!..." and then exhales his final breath.

Agonar, looks on with pride in his heart and says "now thats a brave man!..."

Not to be outdone, Darius, the Pally guild leader grabs a passing member of his guild and instructs him to show his courage and bravery by giving his life also.

The pally immediately turns to his master and snaps a crisp salute followed by an equally gruesome display of his own lifetaking, and a final breathe of 'Justice....'

Darius looks on with pride and says "now thats a brave man!..."

Ol black, the Thief guild leader, senses that the other two expect some action to prove his guilds merit so he ponders action.

As luck would have it he happens to see a teef in the shadows looting the pallies and barbs waiting thier turn in the sparring tournament.

<g>

He grabs the thief out of the shadows and comands him to take his life and in the most heinous manner he can conceive.

The frightened thief looks at ol black with disgust, and spits at his feet, and says "go screw yourself!...

ol black then turns to the other 2 and says "now that is a brave man!...

<bow>

But let me not be too proud of my safety. Even a thief in a jail is safe from another thief.
-Khalil Gibran

The greatest Thief in the history of our guild, could just now be walking through the door with the blindfold on.

GONIFTHEEF

Email Author

Re: Joke 02/23/2004 12:27 PM CST

another one.

There were 3 thieves waiting for their chance for the loyalty test to become assassins.

They are taken one at a time into a room. First an elf, a S'Kra Mur, and a tog.

Kalag says to them all, "you must prove your loyalty to the guild by killing the one in the room. I have put a crossbow in the room for that purpose"

So the elf goes in, and lo and behold, sees his wife sitting in a chair, which is totally unfurnished except for his wife who is sitting tied up on a chair, and a crossbow on the floor.

Nobody hears anything for awhile, then the elf comes out. "I just couldn't do it."

Kalag says, " sorry, you don't have the makings of a true assassin."

The elf hangs his head, and leaves.

Then its the S'Kra Murs turn. She sees her husband tied up in the chair. She goes out, and hisses, "I cannot kill my ssspouse."

Kalag says "you fail as well".

Then its the Togs turn.

Nothing is heard for a long time. Then a loud clattering, thuds, screams and other noises are heard.

The tog comes out and proudly exclaims "Crossbow was unloaded. So me kill husband with chair."

---
A scavenger troll arrives, scouring the area.

The scavenger troll exclaims, "I dinks I like da' Moongate!"

The scavenger troll bends over and picks up the Moongate. After appraising it, the troll places the Moongate in its frayed knapsack

KRAELYST

Email Author

Re: Joke 02/24/2004 12:03 PM CST

Hah! That first joke was great!

When a thief kisses you, count your teeth.
~ old Yiddish proverb

Visit The Locksmith Union - http://www.lurksponge.com/locksmithunion

ACEVEDO-MUNO

Email Author

Re: Joke 12/20/2012 01:26 AM CST

I do not know if you are still around. But I have to say, great story!

Carlos

DragonRealms · Thiefly In-Character Discussions and Reflections